Sobering Decisions

After spending hours working to perfect a series of essays for a Benjamin A. Gilman International Scholarship application this past spring, Tori Andrews decided to get some rest. She awoke soon after closing her eyes, her mind streaming with doubts. "I am never going to get these right. There is no way I will get it. Why keep trying?" she recalled.

But Andrews chooses to act on faith, not doubts, because hope emerges from a deeper place and its impact can be more profound. "The next morning I told myself I was not giving up; I would keep trying, because my heart really, really wants this," she said.

Andrews ultimately was awarded a hard-earned Gilman scholarship for an upcoming SAU winterim study abroad course in Peru, affirming her faith-over-doubt approach.

As she prepared to enroll at St. Ambrose in the Fall of 2020, Andrews' fierce determination also won the essential assistance of a Roy J. Carver scholarship for transfer students. Further faith and resolve led to her selection as one of four students awarded an inaugural McFarlin Scholarship.

In pursuit of a better life, Andrews has leaned on faith and community support. Through both, she's gained the confidence to embrace and achieve what her heart really wants.

The first time, it was sobriety.

"I wanted to be healthy, happy and to be a good mom to my son," Andrews said about her decisions to enter treatment for drug and alcohol abuse disorder in 2016, and, later, to pursue a St. Ambrose degree in social work. "I needed a job, but I didn't want just a job. I wanted a career. I wanted to use my skills and my heart and my experiences to help people," she said.

Andrews joined the SAU Bachelor of Social Work program in 2020, after earning her associate's degree from Scott Community College. She plans to enroll in SAU's Master of Social Work program to gain the next level of education and hands-on experience to accomplish another thing her heart really wants: to help people on probation succeed.

Enrolling in community college 19 years after graduating high school wasn't easy. "I asked a lot of questions and everyone was eager to help," Andrews said. Her peers and instructors guided her in the art of structuring a research paper. Then, at St Ambrose, she discovered the
purpose of writing a reflection paper.

"There has been a lot of deep reflection and it has helped me realize why I believe what I believe. That is the biggest thing St. Ambrose professors have taught me, how to know myself," she said. "It has given me a lot more confidence."

Sandy Cassady, PhD, PT, dean of the College of Health and Human Services, is impressed by Andrews' drive to learn and do all she can. "Tori really wants this," said Cassady, who serves as her McFarlin Scholarship leadership mentor.

"She values higher education and she values being here. She has a real passion and drive to make a difference, to help others. The sky is the limit for her."

Andrews is grateful for the constant support faculty and staff have shown her, like Professor of Theology Micah Kiel, PhD, who encouraged her to apply for the Gilman scholarship. "Any professor that I've had so far, when I go to them with any question they are just like, ‘Oh, yes, you can do this,'" she said.

"I just feel like the right people have been placed in my life continually. I would think I couldn't do it and then there'd be someone offering support, and it reminds me that I am going to be OK. God directs my path and brings these people into my life. I don't want to say I've never had any hardships, but I've never had anything that denies me what I want to do. I just keep going and know there are people there to support me," she said.

"My heart really wants this," she said. "I want to be out in the community helping others."

–Dawn Neuses '94